Sunday, January 17, 2010

A pictorial of an alien invasion...

I mentioned a blog or two ago how the Chihuahuas get inside DG's zippered hoodie and snuggle all in and get warm. Well, I now have photos of the "alien" invading his body. With each step, imagine DG crying out in terror: "ALIEN! AAAAAAAYYY-LEEE-UUUUNNNN!

Step one: Climb to the top.

Step two: Step down slightly, paw at the opening of the hoodie till the human cooperates.

Step three: Start the downward climb into the warmth.

Step four: Get all situated and comfy.

Bonus shot- Look over your shoulder at the crazy lady sitting at the computer who keeps taking those flashy pictures.

So, there you have it. Bruno the twelve pound Chihuahua (who is the single offspring of Luna- the six-ish pound Chihuahua, and Jasper- the four pound Chihuahua) is an alien.

The next bit has some swear words. Nothing overly bad, but I don't want to offend. So, this is your warning.

We also have cats, but they don't venture downstairs much- except for Samantha, because we suspect she thinks she's a dog. But, one of our cats- Arwen- is missing a rear leg. She can run and play like the other cats, but she can't jump. She does sort of a "rock-climb" technique to get up on our bed upstairs. Every time we get an animal addition to our family, they eventually learn that DG can't pick them up normally. They have to turn their back to him so he can pick them up one-handed with his left hand. Arwen learned that pretty quickly. She would thump-thump into our room (you can always tell when its her) and go straight up to DG. Then she would turn her back to him, look over her shoulder and meow loudly. His response was to lean over and pick her up. She wanted on our bed and instead of climbing, she'd demand DG lift her up. When he's not in the room, she climbs up without any assistance.

I told him: "She owns you! She's got you trained."

He said: "No, she doesn't!"

I replied: "You're her bitch! She OWNS you!"

He said: "She does not!"

I pointed out that she comes in, turns and meows at him- in essence, ordering him to pick her up! "Meow, bitch, pick my ass up!"

We started to refer to Arwen's doing that as "Meow, bitch!" As in, "Uh-oh, you've just been meow-bitched!"

The Chihuahuas don't meow or bark for their orders. They simply step up to him and stare till he responds. The most common thing is when Luna wants him to get a blanket. She sits next to the chair and stares at him. He'll look down and she'll wag her tail. He responds in one of two ways- he gets up and gets a blanket or he moves to the sofa (where the blankets are) and sits there so Luna can join him. In essence, Luna "meow-bitched" him. All the dogs do it- except Gypsy the German Shepherd. She just voices her loud opinion in her German Shepherd-y way.

Here's a photo of Arwen with Luna. She got up on the sofa herself. DG wasn't in the room when she wanted up.


Mary Cartledgehayes said...

This photo is a classic -- as is the story.

Mary said...

And now I've put a link on my blog to you, mostly because I find y'all hilarious but also so that my daughter with the chihuahuas can find you.

Patty O'Chair said...

Thanks, Mary.

At the moment, I'm trying to find a way to write about some of the "adult-themed" stuff without freaking out my mother (who reads this) or grossing anyone out. Its all funny stuff, but I'm sure my mom doesn't want to know some of it!

Mary said...

Yeah, I can see your dilemma. A special notation/first sentence may be the key, something like "Don't Tell My Mother I Said This" or "Read at Your Own Risk, Mom." Cause you know your readers are interested...