Wednesday, March 26, 2014

The Disabled Guy hates needles, another Textually Speaking...

I gotta say, these text convos are way easier to share now that I have a phone that does screen captures. I used to have to type them all up manually...


DG hates needles. Which makes the fact he has a monthly blood check even funnier to me. His fear of needles is so bad that he looks away when it happens in a movie. We all do that with some things- for me its anyone causing an injury to themselves. Especially a knee/foot injury, because I've had so many issues with my own that I KNOW how bad it really hurts.

Now, he doesn't faint with this fear of needles. He just can't watch the action. (I can, if they let me. And I'd photograph it, if they'd let me). His fear is that while they're jamming the needles into the flesh, that the needle will break off just under the skin and you'll die before they can stop it. Which is ridiculous and he knows how ridiculous it is- but, phobias make no sense.

This came up because a month ago, I had a steroid shot in my foot for a very long-term plantar faciitis issue. (also known as "bone spurs" and "Pain so bad it feels like a burning hot railroad spike is being hammered into my heel").
Here's a link to my blog about it- with pictures! Well, that shot didn't take. It started out okay, but within a week, I was back to the original level of pain. So yesterday, I had another appointment. My options were limited to: "Get another shot and hope for the best" or "get surgery".

Normally, I'd jump on that surgical bandwagon with the speed of the Flash. Anything to rid myself of this pain. However, one needs at least six weeks to recover (three weeks in a cast) and I don't have that kind of time. In about five weeks, I'm going to start my busy time. The funny thing is- I have about six weeks between all that and the opening of Bristol. But the problem is that I also have fibromyalgia and there is no way to predict how long a delay I'll get from that... but I digress... Today, I sent a text to DG and told him what the doctor told me while I had the needle in my foot.

What he's saying is that he walked into his room, saw a new message 
on his phone and was shocked and grossed out to read what I sent. 

Sunday, March 23, 2014

Well, that escalated quickly- Textually Speaking.

You all remember that the Disabled Guy built a fancy treasure chest for my sea captains, right? If not, here's the link to that post. And you all know that I do that whole photography thing... And in that, I do a 365days self-portrait project. I'm on my fifth year. And this is today's 365 (Day 38). This is just a lighting trick. My flash is on a remote trigger, inside the box, and I used my camera's remote to take the photo... and the flash fires when the camera does- giving us this effect. (basically, there's a camera flash inside the box). But that's not important...

38 of 365 part 5: What's in the box!?

The important part is that I sent that photo in a text to DG and this is our subsequent conversation...

Sunday, March 16, 2014

A new look... and something not about the Disabled Guy

I've been meaning to update this blog's template and overall look, but I've also been procrastinating myself into oblivion because changing things seemed too much like work. Last night, I was stuck awake with my fibro's idea of insomnia ("diet insomnia", if you will). I changed that one over and let me say, the interface has changed a lot since I first did this. It was easy. The hardest part was updating that banner image. The new photo of the Disabled Guy is from this photo I did for my dad- so it's from October of 2012.

Back when I first set up my blogs, I did the layout and colors in a way so my mom could read them. She preferred the darker background and lighter fonts, so that's how I did it. And, well... its been just over two years since she passed away, four months since we lost Dad.

I know this blog is for my conversations with the Disabled Guy, but I've been wanting to get this out for a few weeks now. I miss my parents every single day. Our lives are never going to be as good as they were when my parents were around. They were good people, good parents, and they are going to be missed by me till the day I die. My day-to-day life has been ripped apart.

But one thing I'm relieved about- and this came to me a few weeks ago- is that I'm glad my dad was active and living his life when he passed away. He went suddenly and he still had plans. But he didn't get sick and linger. Mom got sick and in the last year of her life, she hated "being a burden" to us. She wasn't a burden, but she felt like one. And she hated it. So, I'm glad my dad was able to keep doing what they wanted to do. He got home from a trip on that Saturday and he passed away on Monday- after winterizing his RV for the year.

Sorry to bring you down... if it helps, I was crying through those previous two paragraphs and probably missed some grammar mistakes.

Saturday, February 22, 2014

Textually-speaking about sofas and lobsters

A few years ago, DG wanted to build a sofa for our living room because our old one (which wasn't all that old, really) became irreparable. He was looking for a specific type of sofa to copy. You know which kind- from the 1970s- heavy wood construction, bare wood arms and frame, with three cushions with the most god-awful, ugly 1970s style upholstery ever. To do this, he needed me to find a photo of one for him.

I am pretty experienced in Google-fu. I can find almost anything and do so quite quickly. I was so good at Googling things that my dad used to call me and ask me to search for something because it was quicker than him trying to do it himself. But no matter what kind of keywords I put in, I could not find that specific style of sofa. I finally asked in the general discussion area of a message board I used to frequent called "Bonesmart". It was a place for folks with joint replacements and I was one of the youngest people there. And guess what... someone had a photo. Not just a photo, they had the actual wooden frame (without cushions!) in their garage and they literally took a photo for him.

And he built the sofa, which is what we were talking about in this text conversation. I told him that "Raising Arizona" was on and I realized that Nic Cage's character had the entire living room set of that furniture. All those weeks I spent searching the internet for a goddamn photo and it was right there in a DVD that we owned and could have taken a photo of on the TV. So, I've told you all this solely to explain that DG's "I know" is in reply to me telling him that "Raising Arizona" was made by the Coen Brothers, who also made "O, Brother, Where Art Thou?" (a movie that not only he likes, but his father likes too).

So, we went from a discussion about sofas to lobsters, literally like this:

And the "Huge lobster"? Here's that very photo he sent to me.

That is definitely a huge lobster!

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Textually-speaking version 2014

So, as you can see... the Disabled Guy is gone again. I won't bore you with the details, because like I just said- BORING.

I was sitting in the living room, as one does when one is trying to watch a movie, and  I was being smothered under Luna and Gregg, as one has happen when one sits down in my house. I snapped a photo with my phone and sent it to DG with the caption:

"I have a slight problem." 

He replied with a non-committal "Okay."

Then I sent this photo.

"Well... then this happened." 

And here is a screen cap of what happened in our conversation next. I'm in blue, he's in yellow- in case you were not familiar with android smartphones.  (for those who don't know, I recently got a smartphone for the first time. My kids have had their own for years, but this is my first real smartphone- Samsung Galaxy Metrix, in case you were wondering). 

Ahh... good comeback, Disabled Guy... very good comeback! (and he could do it too, you all know it!). 

Monday, December 30, 2013

Sophisticated Mice...

So, I've been wearing out the new album by Steam Powered Giraffe that came out a couple weeks ago. I made DG listen to the "Fancy Shoes" (amateur video from a concert last month) song where this line happens: "Let me tell you a story to clarify the matter: once upon a time, a mouse put on some shoes..." (it happens about 2 minutes 40 seconds into that video)

This morning, he was walking to the kitchen (6 AM, he just got up) and that song was playing on my computer (you can wear out a digital album, right? I have the actual CD just in case). I said: "Oh, he doesn't even know..."

DG: "Know what?"

I backed the song up and replayed that line and said: "How often does that happen? Apparently every time I listen to this song."

DG: "Oh, he doesn't even know. They got four feet. They gotta put shoes on twice every day."

He went into the kitchen and came back out and said: "Unless its a sophisticated mouse. Then he walks on two legs and he only needs one pair of shoes."

After I typed all that, I asked: "If a mouse puts on two pairs of shoes, how does he tie the shoes on his little mouse hands?"

He narrowed his eyes, deep in thought and said in monotone: "Velcro."

After a short pause he added: "Slip-ons. The possibilities are endless."

Me: "Not really. I think those possibilities end there."

DG (still in monotone): "You're probably right."

**For your reading pleasure- "Rats, with their little Nike Shoes"**

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

The Treasure Chest...

I haven't kept up my posting very well in the last six weeks. But- I have the best and worst excuse for it. My father passed away suddenly about a week after my previous post. The last thing on my mind was keeping track of the Disabled Guy's words. I did write a fibro blog post about it (here's the link if you want to read it), but let's move quickly onto something better.

The Disabled Guy finished the treasure chest for my sea captains. He went right to work on it shortly after we had the design conversation. And his way of coping when Dad died was to dive into his work. Along with all the stressful stuff that comes along with the death of a family member (especially one we were so close to), DG dragged me out to the Home Depot every time he had to pick up something for the box. It was his way of "helping" me. He doesn't react properly to emotional situations and he did his best to stay out of my way.

Anyway, here are the details and the photos, because I know that's what you want to see. And in case anyone has forgotten- the Disabled Guy is paralyzed on his right side. He has no use of his right hand and he walks with a limp. He can move his right arm, but it isn't much use to him with his completely useless hand. He uses clamps to hold things and sometimes on larger items, he'll ask a human for help (that human is usually me, sometimes our son, depending on the weight of the thing he needs help with). But as human assistance, we're basically glorified clamps.

Some details- the box is made of pine and is lightweight, but very solid. I can lift it easily (and today- the day I took the photos- I'm in a pain flareup and it was still easy to lift). The handles are for lifting garage doors (we talked to someone at Home Depot who makes/installs garage doors) so they're very strong. The hinges aren't as decorative as DG wanted (those were too big to fit on the box). The latch was pure luck- we spotted it as we were leaving the aisle with the hinges. All the hardware is from the Home Depot and not a craft store, so it is good and strong as well as decorative.

"Treasure Chest" for the Towers Game blocks

Front latch

Inside the box

The side with handle

The back with the hinges

The lid opens all the way and lays "flat"

One of the carrying handles