Conversations with the Disabled Guy

While we were shopping at Sam's Club- because who doesn't need 240 pizza rolls- I learned that people live on the Moon. I don't recall what he said, but I said: "On what planet does [whatever he said] happen?"

DG: "On mine."

Me: "What planet do you live on?"

DG: "The Moon."

Me: "The Moon isn't a planet."

DG: "What?! Of course it is!"

Me: "No, the Moon is the 'moon', it isn't classified as a planet." (I was prepared to go into something about Pluto, but I didn't have the chance, he kept talking).

DG: "That's not what they said."

Me: "What 'they'?"

DG: "The Moon People."

Me: "What 'Moon People'?"

DG: "The people who live on the Moon."

Me: "Where, on the Moon, do they live?"

DG: "Places. Probably houses."

Me: "Wait, there are people who live on the Moon, probably in houses, and nobody has ever seen them?"

DG: "They haven't been looking in the right places."

Me: "We went to the Moon. There were people from Earth, ON the Moon, and they didn't see them."

DG: "You went to the Moon? You didn't go to the Moon!" (he was trying to deflect).

Me: "No, not me, WE.  As a nation, you know, went to the Moon. I don't recall learning about Moon People in school."

DG: "Of course not. They wouldn't teach that in school."

Then he broke off for a second, to ask about the price of something in bulk, so I did the math and told him... then we went back to this:

Me: "Don't stop now, finish telling me the story."

DG: "What story?"

Me: "About the Moon People?"

DG: "What about them?"

Me: "Finish telling me about them."

DG: "They don't exist."

Me: "That's not what you said sixteen seconds ago."

DG: "I was mistaken."

Bonus- on the way to Sam's Club, I was trying to take a mobile phone pic for Facebook and he kept making a face by puffing his cheeks out with his breath and making little weird hissing noises. I finally reached over and pushed his puffed up cheek and said, "Stop doing this, I'm trying to take a photo for Facebook."

He replied, "I'm not making any faces!"

I turned back to my phone to take the shot again and he made the exact same hissing sound as before, which made me laugh, hence the cheesy smile.




So, there you have it... there are people on the Moon who probably live in houses and he doesn't make faces or weird hissing sounds. (despite the fact you can see in the photo he appears to be blowing out his breath as opposed to, you know, just breathing).