The Disabled Guy prefers just a handshake...

So, most of you all know that I do the renaissance faire thing. I dress in garb and
  I also happen to take a lot of photos while I'm there.

A group of friends- who I refer to collectively as "My Sea Captains"- play a game called Spanish Towers. It is also known as "Sword Point Towers" and "Giant Jenga"... originally, they played with a set of blocks that came in a nice little box with terribly sharp handles and they'd just drag that around from location to location. I'm not entirely sure what prompted the change (something about swords, stabbings, splinters)- but now they have different blocks and no box to cart them around in and it is a little bit of a pain in the ass. That's a lot of blocks and they're not very big blocks, so the odds of losing one or two is pretty good.

Here are a few photos of My Sea Captains and the game of Spanish Towers-








You get the idea...

Well, at the most recent Gathering of Rogues and Ruffians, I suggested to my sea captains that I'd ask the Disabled Guy if he could/would make a box for them to tote their blocks around in. And of course, he said he would.

Today, the Disabled Guy started "wondering" about the box he was going to create (and he's got like, six months as they technically don't need it till Janesville Renaissance Faire).  He was asking me dimensions (it happens to be written down- the measurements) and I thought he was confused by how big it had to be. The tower measures 32 inches by 10.5 by 10.5. So, I kept re-explaining it to him.

When you translate English into Stroke English, sometimes it takes a few different tries to get to one the Stroke person can understand. But he finally got it across to me- he was asking if the box had to be a perfectly-shaped rectangle.

DG: "This box... what if I made it look like a treasure chest? You know, with the top [hand gesture] that isn't flat? Rounded on top?"  and he kept making a slightly round-on-top gesture with his hand.

Me: "They would probably love that. They would love it a lot. You know, if you did that, the sea captains would woo you. They would woo you so hard!"

DG: "What does that mean?"

Me: "Woo, you know, like romantically... I have a video where the captains are teaching Andrew how to woo a lady."

DG: "Who is Andrew?"

Me: "That's Anne-Drew. A girl named Kait plays Anne-Drew, Frobisher's ship's boy..."

I could see I was starting to lose him- too many names, too much detail- so I said: "I have a video. C'mere... this is where the sea captains teach Anne-Drew how to woo a lady."


After he saw the video, he chuckled. "Woo a lady... tell 'em a handshake is just fine. They can woo someone else."

For the record, I sent a text to Captain Hawkyns with a very shortened version of that conversation and his reply to the treasure chest was: "Yup, we'd like that a bit."

Unfortunately for Anne-Drew, that means there probably won't be wheels on one end for ease of dragging. But at least it'll look cool, right? And he said he'd make sure the handles don't cut into fingers- he hates hat too.

Oh, and just in case anyone forgot about his box-making skills...

Textually Speaking, Photography version

For those who don't know, I'm a freelance photographer. And I don't mean that I'm a bored housewife who takes a photo of a lawnchair, throws a sepia filter on it and calls herself an artist and photographer. I'm totally legit in that I get paid to take photos. I've sold some art photos and I have a semi-regular gig doing product photos for a local clothing designer. Product photos are mostly technical and very little art. Now, originally, I'd get a call or email every few months and I'd take photos of three or four shoes. And a few times, I took photos of a few totally wonderful leather jackets. One thing- the shoes are hard to photograph because this designer uses amazing leather that is so soft and beautiful that it doesn't stand up on its own. And the jackets? Oh, my... if I could just wrap up in one forever, I'd be happy, they're that soft.

But I digress...

A couple weeks ago, the call came in for me to drive to Rockford and take photos of "some shoes". That turned out to be 11 products. Six photos per product. This is my usual set up, my makeshift "light box". A roll of "bright white" artist paper, a couple of lights and a table. When I was shooting just a few sandals of darker colors, it was fine. But this last shoot involved not just brown and black, but blue, gold, and several different white sandals.




With all the varying colors, the background changed shades from whitest-white to dark grey. So, I invested in a light tent (just like a "real" photographer would use!). This with three lights should work great...

One light on each side, one over the top, and you get a stark white background and very little Photoshopping is needed.




So, I still had a little bit of an issue with shadows on the bottom, which is no biggie, really... but I decided to see if I could get that floating white background without having to Photoshop (that's referred to as: "in camera"). I found a link that tells how to do it easily with what I've got already (the light tent is a plus) and a sheet of Plexiglas. Now, the person who wrote the blog kept referring to it as "Plexiglas" and "bendable Plexiglas". So, I was wondering if they were thinking of something else and just CALLING it Plexiglas (which is a brand name, like Kleenex and Xerox).

So, I texted the Disabled Guy with: "Is Plexiglas bendy?"

DG: "No. Why?"

Me: "Is there a clear plastic thing that's bendy? Slightly bendy, not fold-in-half bendy. "

DG: "No. What do u need it 4?" (look how good he is with the text speak!)

Me: "I found a way to get the background I need for the product pics & they kept calling it Plexiglass, but it's bendy."

DG: "It does bend."

Me: "You just told me Plexiglas doesn't bend."

DG: "No I didn't."

Me: [forwarded his text back to him with my original question]

DG: "Well, look at that. I guess I did."

Me: "So... can I get this at Home Depot or something?"

DG: "I thought you was asking if I had any. No, I don't. Yes, you can."

So, I need to make a run to Home Depot to get a piece of bendy Plexiglas because apparently, we don't have any at the house.

Textualization

All my friends know that I do a 365 self-portrait project. The kids taking notes for the test later will know that I'm about a month into my fourth year (and haven't missed a day yet).

DG doesn't care about my 365. It has become just something I do. He doesn't even acknowledge me when I say: "I gotta do my 365" and then disappear from the room for about a half hour while I take random photos of myself till I get one I like or fits with a theme. He has been in a few, very reluctantly.

Day 65 of Year One

Day 216 of Year Two

Day 238 of Year Three

There are a few others that have him in the background or just his hand in the shot. But the amount of cajoling and nagging it took to get him into those photos was ridiculous. Even now, I say to him: "I need you for my 365- JUST YOUR HAND..." because if I don't say it fast enough, he will whine. Literally whine out: "Oh, man! Why!?"

I've been doing some creative self-portraits in the last few months (Link to Facebook album of the Creative Self-portraits). Some requiring Photoshop special effects. But even when I say: "Hey, look at my 365...", he almost always glances and says, "Okay." and that's that. No feedback, no compliments. I don't talk about the negative stuff related to his disability much, because that's not what this blog is about. But most of the time, we're more like roommates. There's a line between "spouse" and "nurse" that I've had to cross more often than I'd like and there's pretty much no romance. Definitely no passion. Day-to-day, he acts mostly like I'm a piece of furniture till he needs me to do something for him.

Last night, I got a text out of the blue.

"Why don't you wear lipstick? That 365 was hot."

I wasn't sure it was him. He doesn't compliment my photography and he damn sure hasn't called me "hot" in years. So, I told him that lipstick tastes terrible and is messy. And the particular lipstick I wear in my creative 365s is black-red, so it even stains things (all things, actually). It isn't something I'd wear every day even if I did wear lipstick.

We proceeded to have a conversation through text about my 365s, the Photoshop techniques I use to get the color-select effect, "sexy" poses for my 365, and makeup. I had to explain the 365 rules to him because he didn't get the whole "rejected" shot thing. The rules are simple, take a photo of yourself, once a day, every day, for a year. You can only submit one photo a day. But once in a while, my "reject" shots are just as cool or I just like them, so I keep them. I'll use them on Facebook or upload them to Flickr for a different group.

I really don't know why I didn't give up on him when it came to my 365. I don't get feedback around the house. Just online. But in the past year, I've been saying: "Come here and look at this photo" because I've impressed myself and want to share it. Not just 365 photos, but all photos. He begrudgingly gets up and comes to look at the monitor. He'd mutter an "okay" and a few times, he's said "whatever" when I told him how I got the shot or what I did to it in Photoshop.

But last week, I sent him a text and asked if he'd like to see my 365. He said sure. He replied with: "Cool."

And then that random text last night.

"Why don't you wear lipstick. That 365 was hot."

The end of our text conversation last night:

DG: "What's a sexy pose you can do for a 365?"

Me: "I dunno. Anything, really. The one you liked was an accident."

DG: "You should do that. I bet people like that."

Me: "I'm sure some do." There was a long break, so I said: "Did you just ask me to do a sexy 365 for tomorrow?"

DG: "Did I? Okay. I did."

I don't know what the hell is going on, but I'm gonna do it.